Throwback Tuesday Was Yesterday
Aaaannndd I’m back!!! After so many months! I’ve been busy with school work and preparing for our choir’s International tour that’s why I hadn’t had the luxury of time to update. But here I am!
Since I just graduated from college (YES, FINALLY!!!), I decided to declutter all the papers at home to make way for a new start. 😉 Well you know what I mean. And I’ve been finding things from my earlier years of college and even from high school and grade school! This post is supposed to be entitled Throwback Tuesday only from the previous statement but since I figured I wouldn’t be able to finish it today, I changed it. Weirdo’s gotta explain her weirdness.:))
So the thing that caught my attention the most today is this paper I wrote for English class in my 4th year in high school dated December 5, 2006 and it’s about what I would do if given only 3 days left to live. Here’s what I wrote:
Our life on Earth would, sooner or later, end and we can’t do anything to prevent that. We are not even given the knowledge as to when or where. It is only God who knows when our lives are supposed to end.
However, exploring the many possibilities, what if we are given a rare chance of learning when we would die? This would mean a chance of preparing ourselves and the people that we may leave behind before we leave this world. There is still a chance of doing things and seeing things the last time.
If I would be given three days to live, there would be many things that I’d like to do and a lot of things I’d like to see. On the first day, I will wake up early in the morning and prepare breakfast for my mom and my ate Kat or whoever is with us in the house. Next, I will call my bestfreids who I consider as my sisters. I will invite them to go with me to Enchanted Kingdom to just have fun. Once we’re there, I’ll make sure that nothing else would interfere and it would be total bonding time between the four of us. We’ll scream through the space shuttle, wail our lungs out in the Anchor’s Away, cross our fingers as we drop in the Jungle Log Jam and get soaking wet after plunging into the waters of the Rio Grande Rapids. At lunch, we will stuff our mouths with burgers, pizza slices and other delicious food. After, we will have fun racing against each other in the Go Kart race tracks and enjoy ourselves in the other rides. As soon as the sun comes down, I’d accompany them home and call KENNDiV, my circle of friends at school and the others, Lypaips. I will then invite them to go to a movie and just chill in the mall till it closes, We will meet at Festival Mall and upon choosing the movie, we’d all agree upon, we’d buy large buckets of popcorn and large drinks to go with it. Next we’d go to Gameworks and play billiards and bowling. When we get tired, we’ll resort to playing in X-site and riding the roller coaster there. When the mall closes at 10pm, we’d all go home. But before that, I’ll hug them tightly one by one because it will be the last time that I can do so. They should know nothing about my 3 day limit. Upon getting home, I’ll kiss my mom and take her hand to “mano”. We’ll watch that Koreanovela “My Girl” for the last time until our eyes give in to the forces of slumber. Before going to sleep, I will talk to God and thank him for giving me this rare chance, expressing deep gratitude that the first day was successful.
On the second day, I will again prepare our breakfast. After eating, I will go by myself and commute to Makati City and spend time alone. Of course before that, I have to ask some money from my mom in order for me to be able to enjoy myself. Upon getting there, I will watch a movie and after go to an arcade then window shop. In the afternoon, I will no proceed to our music studio and just hang out with my fellow students and our mentor. I’ll go home at night just in time to watch Primetime Bida with my mom. After watching, we are going to sleep waking up to the last day.
I don’t think I ever passed this paper though because it doesn’t have red marks from the teacher on it. As I read my paper again, I remember my life then. Simple. I wanted the obvious things, maybe a bit more shallow. For my last three days on earth I wanted to be with friends and family. Perfectly understandable. Then I wanted to go to an amusement park because I enjoy going to amusement parks. I wanted to watch some movies and eat what I wanted to eat because anyhow last days are last days. But if you ask me now what I would do? Here’s how my last three days will go.
On the first morning, I will wake up early and go to church to hear mass. The earliest possible because time is running out. And this time, I will listen to Him and I will spend time thanking Him for each and everything He has done as an Almighty Father to me and to ask for forgiveness for the things I have done as a bad child. And then, dazed I will be because of this predicament, I will spend time alone, reflecting on everything that has gone on in my life. And then I’d decide that today will be spent reconnecting with the people I love who has been with me all the time, through everything. My friends, my family, even teachers and mentors. Just hearing their voice would be enough for me. I’d be doing this inside a coffee shop, maybe CBTL to be exact because that is my favorite coffee/tea shop, in the furthest corner by the window. I’ll be calling my teachers first from high school and then from college. I’d be calling my favorite teacher in college last, she has made me afraid for a big part of my life but who has changed my life for the better, to her I owe a big chunk of learnings in college. I will definitely tell her THANK YOU. Then my voice mentors go next, from my first formal voice mentor who I love dearly, to all my conductors in the university choir. They have all taught me to believe in myself and they have brought me to realize how much music meant to me. They have taught me many things and brought me to different places, to them, I am deeply grateful. Then I will call my high school friends, one by one. That’s five of them and I’ll call last the one whom I’ve hurt the most during those days and I’ll tell her how sorry I am. Next I’d call my college friends one by one. That’s eleven, five girls, six boys. I’d spend time to talk to each and every one of them. I’d call my closest college friend last. She has never left my side through the most difficult phase of my life which is College. Not only for the good times but also for the tears I shed, her arm would always be around my shoulders to comfort me. For the late nights deciphering how to pass the exam tomorrow cramming like crazy, I thank her for being with me. Then I will call my closest friend in the neighborhood, my childhood crush who has become a dear friend almost like a brother, and everyone else I could think of who has touched my life and made it how it was… At that point I will know, I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
That first night, I will spend under the stars, on an open field, something I wouldn’t do or rather couldn’t do on a normal day but since I have two days left, then why the hell not right?
The second day will be spent reconnecting with the people I love but haven’t really talked to. I’d probably cry the whole day today but who cares, I’ll be dying anyway. The first person I’d meet up with is the girl who knows me more than I know myself. We’d talk again, laugh again, probably cry together again, and she’d still know me more than I know myself. Then I’d meet up with my sisters who’ll forever be home to me. Even though we seldom see each other anymore, we’ll know that the friendship has never faded away. Then we will sing together one last time, that song I made for us way back when our friendship was just starting. And then we’ll record it so that it’ll truly “Last Forever”(this is the actual title of our song). Then I’ll call my family in the province and I will beg them to fly to where I am on the last day… The last one I will go to will be my dad. Or if I couldn’t meet him I could just call him and hear his voice. Enough said.
That night will be spent normally, watching television with my mom eating dinner like we always do while watching. It’s the my last normal night on earth after all. But this time, I will take time to talk to her and tell her I love her, how grateful I am of her love and how sorry I am for hurting her. That’s what we learn in moments like this right? Never pass up the chance to say I love you, I’m sorry and Thank you.
During the last day, I’d want to have a party. Something fun. A get together with teachers, classmates, friends and family, in a the mountains where the sunrise and the sunset would be easily accessed. There I will hug everyone goodbye.
Then for the last few hours, I will watch the sun as it dies on me, with the man I love and his arms around me. As the light fades away and as I go with it, I’d know that my last days on Earth will be filled with love but then a higher form of love will be waiting for me.. That which is God.
Nikkapella 